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| moved to a diff xanga ! try and find me | | |
| Your Shadow
If only you'd ask, I'd be there
But as time goes by, it seems unfair
By you, I stand through it all
To be the arms that catch your fall
On my sleeve my heart is worn
And day after day it is slowly torn
Cold, in your shadow, I faithfully stand
Longing to one day grasp your hand
But still I wait as months become years
My eyes become swollen with uncried tears
Maybe if I hold on and let things be
One day you'll realize the answer is me
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| i love you
read this first --»when theres nothing left for me u go ahead and give me this indescribable feeling in the pit of my stomach its not a bad feeling but its not good. u make me feel as if the whole world means nothing to me but you like it should. you make me feel like im everything to you yet im nothing at all. i feel like im in love though im not sure what that means because everything isnt always what it seems. sure ur hugs and kisses are always sweet u say ull be there till my last heartbeat. these lovely words mean nothing to me because these words are not meant to be said but only meant to be done. u say u know everything about me but u havent taken one step in my shoes where you've got nothing but everthing to lose. where all my thoughts and feelings are expressed on the inside where i have nothing but everything to hide. emotions so intense it can burn you up inside out. everything is so real theres no doubt u never know whats going to happen next or if theres going to be another regret. the pain and tears left from past years stay in my mind so i can think back or press rewind. reminiscing about the good ol' days and blocking out the bad. theres ugly yet painstakingly beautiful feelings u never knew u had. the breathtaking memories of me and you have been captured in my head things that will be thought of every night before i go to bed. my life is like an everlasting rollercoaster it has its ups and downs times when im feeling delectable and times when my head is buried in the ground. u never know when this ride will end maybe today maybe it should have yesterday maybe tomorrows my day. i always think to myself why am i living on this earth what am i really worth ? this world where all ur sorrows are gone by tomorrow where u learn to live and let it be where all life's important lessons are learned in pain. in the end what does everyone really gain ? where u dream as u'll live forever and live as u'll die today. where material things are what everyone wants but love is what they really need. u have to live up to other ppl's standards to succeed. if this is really what the world is then why did God create Jesus, Adam and Eve? why is there a bible if commercials are what we need to believe. all the things i've learned while growing up my manners principles and the truth of everything are brought down by you telling me all these lies and what i have been doing is wrong. you took away everything i've worked for so long. as much as i say i hate you it will never be true because inside i really love what u've done for me by telling me what i cant do u've taught me my life is up to me and not to you. if u think this shit is deep take a step back and repeat. | | |
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i dont know what to do tomorrow imma be hella bored. huyens house was hella fun we were talking about hella stupid shit from the new inside jokes to plucking eyebrows it was comedy over there
. JOANNA AND HUYEN omg hella funny ass girls. i feel hella comfortable at her house plus she has more food then me. -____- haha im glad ur back tu and susan !! i wanna go back to huyens house !!!!! im so fucking bored i cant sleep. and huyen i love ur new eyebrows so clean and unbushy. lol WHAT WAS I THINKING?!
hehe the hot cheetos and capri suns. yesterday was noreen and tams one month so yippeee for them. blah my parents are having this party thingy on sunday and it will also be huyens birthday .imma go to the movies that day with huyen and joanna and noreen and some guys named mac ceejay and daniel i think.
well i hope i go so i can sneak to huyens house ! xP i wanna see a cinderella story with the hot chad michael murray !
well the point of this webblog was i really miss huyens house !! i feel really really comfortable there like no one cares how i act but at my house its like everyones behind my back watching me closely so i can get yelled at but whatever it doesnt matter anyways nothings gonna literally get taken away from me so yeah. 
i need a lock on my door i hate ppl barging in my effin room no ones heard of knockin some rude ass people goshhhhhh !! anyways... someone call me if u guys wanna go somewhere. i dont wanna stay home anymore.
hahah... and whoever wrote that thing comment in my xanga well i have something to say to that... u are SAD most ppl hate because they're jealous anyways 
so bye and dont be an online banger and say that shit in my face please?! toodles